Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Photos of Our House

We're in the middle of a very hectic move, and blogging hasn't been on my mind, but here are some photos of the house we're buying in Woodinville.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Thoughts on War

You just cannot kill everybody who doesn't agree with you. You can't do it. You'll kill enough of them, and pretty soon, you'll be down to the nitty gritty that is just you guys, and then you'll start disagreeing with each other... In other words, you cannot get to where you want to be by pushing against what you do not want - it never, ever works.

--- Abraham

I'm taking this metaphorically to include killing people in my mind, arguing with them, telling them they're wrong, making laws against their beliefs, punishing them, trying to control them.... For anytime I condemn war, I have to look into my own head and heart and stop warring on others with my thoughts. War is simply a reflection of what we're experiencing on the inside.

From a T-shirt seen on the streets of Geneva: More candy. Less war.

May everything I do be for the greatest good of all!

Jolene =)

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Infinite Possibilities and Transitions

Mind boggling thinking of the infinite possibilities of all the different human experiences. As humans, we're not comfortable with boggled minds, so we research, analyse, write, sort through it all to come up with right and wrong. Even those with the strongest opinions still change their opinions but then jump on the horse of their new opinion. I am learning to be comfortable with the idea that it's all true... or none of it is. Overall, I feel much better with this thought than with trying to decide what I think is right or wrong. I have better relationships with my children when I can accept that something they do or say is true or "right" for them or for that moment. I notice that change happens whether I allow it to or not, whether I force it or not. When I cannot accept something and either try to block it or force it, I just make myself miserable and disconnect from those I love.

I've been practicing this in our recent transition as well. We are transitioning. It is what we want and it is happening no matter what we do now. I can have anxiety over every detail, or I can accept the uncertainty of each moment and trust that all is moving forward. This transition is a force of its own and I cannot control it now. I must reserve my energy for myself, not use it up trying to control everybody and every experience, trying to make everyone happy, trying to help others when I'm needing so much help and support myself. I must trust that all things will happen just in time or I will know what to do when action is needed.

This entire time in Geneva has been a transition for us. We were like caterpillars. We decided to enter this new state of transformation. What a risk, what uncertainty, we didn't even know what we were doing, just knew that it's what we wanted and needed. The last two years have been full of uncertainty, and I have spent half of the time riding it, making the most of it, loving it, and the other half of the time worrying about it and wondering anxiously about what my next move would or should be. Now I can see that all that we were dissolved in this stage of chrysalis. Bit by bit we are taking the parts we want to keep, reforming into different, larger, more than we were before.

There is no end. Human life on earth is a transition itself. It never gets done. Just like I could not have known what our personal transition would do for us, I cannot know what this life will do for All That Is. All I can do is enjoy it, or not. All I can do is keep moving forward, trusting that motion and my place in it.

With great love!
Jolene =)

Friday, September 4, 2009

Today I Feel Silly

Joran always loves teasing and tricking people. Of course, John and I love teasing and tricking Joran and eachother. So, Joran will often say or do something crazy, but with a twinkle in his eye, like he can't wait to see if someone believes him.

One thing Joran does a lot is pretend he doesn't love his sister. Like today, he said, "She's not my sister! She's a phoney! She's a lier! Send her to the dump!" Just awful, right? Well, the whole time, he's holding back a grin and I cannot help but laugh!

Sometimes Joran's tricks bother me. I start feeling offended by his words or irritated with his chaotic actions, and then we both end up mad at eachother. But if I somehow join in the silliness, and even when I'm telling him he can't continue with such-and-such, maintain a silly nature, it all dissipates in fairly good time, and we all feel better in the end.

The title of this post comes from a children's book by Jamie Lee Curtis, Today I Feel Silly (and other moods that make my day). The colorful, swirly pictures and the story of a red-headed girl and her emotional life remind me that ALL of our moods are what make life so rich!

Happy Day to you!

Jolene =)

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Life Gets Even More Interesting

I know I have run this photo before, but it absolutely matches my emotions of late! A picture is worth....


We have been in a whirl over here! There is so much to update! I've been pretty secretive about it on my blog, because John was waiting to give his resignation at work, and however slim, I did not want to take any chances on his company finding out anything through my blog. Anyways, as you've probably guessed, or have been told through secret calls and e-mails, John has a new job and we are moving back to Seattle.

Who will John be working with? Microsoft? Nope. PopCap Games. It's a small casual games company of only about 300 employees based in Seattle with a few other worldwide locations. You might have seen one of their games, Bejeweled, on Facebook. We also play Feeding Frenzy and Plants vs Zombies. The games are cool and the company is a real winner! I can't wait to get to know the company personally -- John came back with awesome reports after his interviews.

Not sure on the details of the move, but in the meantime, we are selling as much as possible and giving away a lot, too. We love simplifying our lives and clearing clutter, but we're also trying to fit into one of the small shipping containers. It's fun, but certainly adding another level of busy-ness to our lives. I really feel like my head is spinning these days!

Joran and Jasmijn are handling it all in their own ways. Today I complimented Joran and said how impressed I was with how he was handling all this. "You're taking it like a man," I said. "No, Mommy," said Joran, "I'm taking it like a ninja!" My sweet boy! Jasmijn buries her head in my chest and cries out every time someone new comes to the door. She spends a lot of time in the sling.

Before we know it, all of our things will be moved and the apartment will be ready for new tenants. Before we know it, we'll be hanging out with Mickey Mouse and saying our good-byes to John's family. Before we know it, we'll be walking into our new home! Before we know it!

Live well!

Jolene =)